Throughout the history of the world, there have been leaders and followers. Viewed through the lens of history, some of these leaders have been truly awful, yet they still managed to accrue followers.
Have you ever stopped to examine this phenomenon and wonder why that's true?
Why even the worst of leaders seem to always gather around them a group of followers?
Before you write it off to idiocy on the part of the followers, or charisma on the part of the leader, it can actually be summed up in a much simpler explanation. Leaders do not second guess themselves.
The leaders who people will follow without question have natural confidence and self esteem. The self-assurance that they know what they're doing, all of the time. The followers, the people who are always looking for a leader? They're the ones constantly second guessing themselves, constantly looking for outside reassurance that they've made the right decision.
How do these leaders build this self confidence? For some, it comes naturally, as naturally as breathing. For others, it was instilled in them from birth. By nature, or by nurture, self confidence can be learned. If you're struggling with second guessing yourself, especially if it is interfering with your ability to make any kind of decisions, you need to work on building your self esteem by consistently making small decisions and building upon those by making more decisions. Doing this consistently will help you second guess yourself less.
You can start with simple exercises conducted on your own, every day. Make a decision, even a simple one such as what to have for breakfast. Make this decision consciously. Even decide the night before, what you're going to have for breakfast, and then follow through. Even if obstacles get in your way, follow through on your plan as if it’s the most important thing in the world. If you're trying to build self esteem, rest assured, it IS the most important thing in the world.
After a few days of consciously deciding what you're going to eat throughout your day, take your new found self confidence and move it outside your world. Most of us have some idea, or maybe even more than one, that could improve our work flow, or improve the way our company does business. It takes a confident decision maker to make those suggestions or improvements!
Here’s my top 3 tips to stop second guessing yourself:
#1) Recognize that most people are afraid to voice their ideas out of fear of failure. That fear, is a fear only followers experiences. True leaders don't fear failure, they embrace failure, and accept it as a part of life. For every failure they experience, another lesson is learned that will lead them to success.
#2) Learn to accept any mistakes or failures, to learn from it, and to eventually strive for success in everything you do. Approach every decision as if you always have, and always will make the right one. Eventually, that will be true, more often than not.
#3) Start making consistent daily decisions, and sticking by them.
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