Humour has power; laughter can heal rifts, heal the body, soothe the mind, lighten the atmosphere and bring people closer together. Knowing how to use humour is a talent that makes people popular and appropriate use of humour can diffuse all types of volatile situations.
Humour comes in all shapes and sizes and while we love to laugh, we need to be very careful when poking fun at ourselves. You have no doubt experienced someone before who has this uncanny knack of being able to have fun at their expense and have the room in stitches? They can put themselves down playfully and it makes them look even more confident and assertive but these self-deprecating tactics come from someone usually who is totally at ease with their self and for most of us, this is something to avoid.
Self-deprecating humour is a fine line to walk and if you get the balance wrong then you can find yourself in a very uncomfortable situation.
Self-deprecating humour is an indication of insecurity. People who make fun of themselves not only make the people around them uncomfortable, but they are letting other people know how little they respect themselves and are therefore letting other people know that they are OK with others putting them down too.
Always remember that people will only respect you as much as YOU respect yourself!
If you are wallowing in your insecurities and weaknesses and vocalizing that to other people, you are essentially begging for NEGATIVE attention and looking for other people to validate you.
Absolute confidence is built when you act with confidence and support yourself, respect yourself and permit yourself to have a good time in other peoples company without feeling the need to be the butt of your own jokes.
A happy and healthy way to live your life is to focus on the good in your life to be happy in your own skin and to really pay attention to the good things. What you focus on you will attract more of, self-deprecating humour means you focus on the weaker or more negative aspects of your life, personality or experiences, this is the exact opposite to what you want to be focusing on.
Also when you poke fun at yourself, often it is in the back of your mind that it would be good from someone to disagree with you or even complement you, fishing for complements is rarely successful and again, this shows a level of neediness that can make you feel like a social leaper.
Have a laugh with friends and if you cannot think of a joke or funny story that is OK! Not everyone has the right timing to deliver amusing tales and the laughter is what feeds the comics of the group, we don’t have to be funny to find something funny after all.
Remember to stay away from putting yourself down and using self-deprecating humour and you too will be on the road to starting to enjoy your own absolute confidence.