The most powerful words you can ever say are: "I love myself."
But unfortunately self-love hasn’t really been encouraged over the course of history. Our society has labeled people who love themselves openly as egotistical, vain and selfish. It’s no wonder why most people fear the thought of loving ourselves openly. But, the degree to which you can honestly and authentically love yourself will determine the degree to which you are able to love others. I believe that our society is slowly starting to change, and women are beginning to understand the importance of self-love and self-confidence. I know that my Omi’s generation was very different.
The women back then were not at all encouraged to love and express themselves. As a result growing up, my Mom was taught what she learned from her Mom. But fortunately, my Mom broke the cycle and encouraged me to be myself and love the person I am. Wouldn’t it be amazing if children nowadays were encouraged to build their confidence and self-love? Self-love is not about being conceited, vain or selfish. All of those words have a very different definition and action than that of self-love.
Self love is:
There is only one of you in the entire universe! Why not embrace your uniqueness? Each of us is completely different from one another. It’s important to note that everyone feels they have certain things about themselves that they see as flaws or as weaknesses. No one is perfect! Once you are able to recognize your strengths and your self-worth you are then able to start to love yourself. If you are also able to recognize that the path you've chosen is different from anyone else's, it is easier to detach yourself form the views of other people and follow your own path without feeling the need to compare yourself to others.
Have a loving relationship with yourself, you are going to spend the rest of your life with yourself, so be sure to appreciate and celebrate YOU. When you have self-love you will become happier and project that happiness and love to the people around you. I'm not suggesting that we stop caring for and loving others, by nature women are caregivers, and I believe that love for others is extremely important. But what I am suggesting is that you take the time to appreciate the most important person in your life, who probably gets the least amount of your attention…YOU!
My 7 tips to giving yourself love are:
Say “I love you” --to yourself that is!
Go and look yourself in the mirror and say those precious words to yourself!
Write down 10 things you really like about yourself
Take the time to explore and write down 10 things that you like about yourself. It can be anything, big or small.
Say “No” when you want to.
Say it in a confident manner. Be firm, polite, respectful and do not be overly apologetic. This gives the signal that you are sympathetic, but will not easily change your mind if pressured.
Do something nice for yourself.
Is there a beautiful dress you’ve had your eye on for a while and kept telling yourself you don’t need it. Or a cute pair of shoes, or earrings? A little trinket of some sort that makes you smile when you see it? Why not do something nice for yourself. Spoil yourself this weekend and go get it! You deserve it!
Do something that relaxes you.
Go for a walk in nature, take a yoga class, read, go for coffee, get a massage.
Buy yourself flowers or chocolates. Don't wait around for someone else to do it for you!
Go to the spa or hair salon.
Make yourself feel beautiful, for you!
Blast this song and sing along!
Remember this beautiful song from Whitney Houston, The Greatest Love Of All:
"I decided long ago, never to walk in anyone's shadows
If I fail, if I succeed
At least I'll live as I believe
No matter what they take from me
They can't take away my dignity
Because the greatest love of all
Is happening to me
I found the greatest love of all
Inside of me
The greatest love of all
Is easy to achieve
Learning to love yourself
It is the greatest love of all."
If you could use some help learning how to love yourself more, please contact me anytime!
Send me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org
Or give me a call at 604.230.5538