“I’ll try to make it. I’ll try to be on time. I’ll try to be happier. I’ll try…” Sound familiar? We hear it all the time —SO many people say it, I hear it so often. And it’s a word that absolutely needs to be deleted from your vocabulary! There is no such thing as try! You either choose to DO it, or choose NOT do it! Period.
Try is such a disempowering word. Just like several other words such as: just, can’t and should check out my blog post all about that HERE
When you say “I’ll try” you are doing all of the following:
• Not making a decision
• Making an excuse
• Giving yourself an out
• Not committing
• Not being accountable
• Being unreliable
• Giving yourself a reason for failure in advance!
That’s a lot, right???
And although some might say that when you try to do something, there is some sort of effort, the reality is that there’s no commitment with a try, and without commitment most things don’t end up getting done.
When I hear my Confidence Coaching clients say “I’ll try”, I immediately point it out to them and help them understand that they are saying it because they likely have a fear of letting others down. They don’t want to disappoint —other people OR themselves. They like to be thought of as a nice person, easy to get along with, and accommodating, so nice, and always there to do things for others.
I used to be a People Pleasing Perfectionist, so I know ALL about it. Us women are really good at this, having been socially conditioned to put everyone else’s need before our own. But know that you when you do this, you are losing sight of your authentic self.
If that sounds like you, I strongly encourage you to explore why you have the need to please others. I call it the “Disease to Please.”
Check out the blog post I wrote all about People-Pleasers –The High Price for Being Too Nice
So, from now on, make the confident decision to either “Do” something or “Don’t.”
Let’s all have the courage to tell the truth!
I’d WAY rather have someone tell me that they can’t or won’t commit to something, instead of saying that they’ll try and then not follow through or make up some story later about why they aren’t going to be able to do it.
Have the confidence and assertiveness to speak up and say your truth.
That is being authentic and honour yourself!
That is how you gain respect from others, and more importantly for yourself! 😀